Saturday, September 26, 2009

In Belichick, I trus...fear

Fisch emailed me a Bill Simmons column about the last Jets game of last season where Simmons perfectly captured how pissed I was about having to feel the grossness of rooting for the Jets, only to have them fail. Fuck you Fahvrah, fuck you very much. Every since, I've been a huge Bill Simmons fan. I love his writing, I love his love of the Patriots, all his Red Sox/Celtics columns, but big Bill Simmons hugs from me. And then I read this column.

Everyone in the Kool-Aid Camp believes in certain axioms that may no longer be true -- stuff like "never bet against the Patriots after a loss" and "when in doubt, Belichick will come through." They trust the foundation: eight straight winning seasons, three Super Bowl titles and the best eight-year overall record of any team in 20 years. The foundation will prevail. Always.

(Important note: My father is a charter member of this group. In fact, when I told him that I planned to write this column, he hissed things like, "it's too early," "we'll be fine," "you give up on our teams too easily," "this reminds me of when you quit on the Celtics two springs ago" and "you're an a**hole and I wish we weren't related." All solid points.)

For the second camp, it's more complicated. You wouldn't call them naysayers, just realists. And here's the reality: Today's NFL isn't built for teams to succeed year after year indefinitely. Extending the Malibu analogy, a good foundation only lasts so long. You still need to take care of your house. Need to wash the salt off your deck every day, update the furniture, keep a fresh coat of paint on there, check that foundation every few months to make sure it's fine. You cannot slip. You cannot fall behind. You cannot take anything for granted. Or else your house will start to look like crap.

As for himself he says: As a realist and a Kool-Aid drinker, for the life of me, I cannot decide between Camp No. 1 and Camp No. 2.

Me too! Except not really, I actually think Bill Belichick might be the dark lord himself. Like, um, THE dark lord, THE. He just does everything right, all the time! How he got caught in the silly, little videoing nonsense, I'll never know. Except, it had to be in his plan somehow...
So, when Brady tore his ACL and Cassel, who hadn't started a game since high school moved to the helm, I wasn't worried. I wasn't! I remember telling Alceste, after the loss to the Dolphins, that I was sure Belichick would do whatever he needed young Cassel to step up...including, but not limited to kidnapping the kid's mother until the losing stopped.
And so it is now, Belichick will find a way. First, when Kevin O'connell's body is found, I know Bill WILL have an alibi. Just sayin'. Second, um...Giselle needs to watch her stupid Nazi interception Tom throws....again, just sayin'. Belichick don't play.
So, Atlanta tomorrow...
Our defense sucks, our offense is injured, Brady is dead and well, the Falcons don't exactly suck...Not.A.Good.Combo.
But fingers crosses, Pats jersey on back, in Belichick I...fear.


  1. Aren't you playing vinny this weekend in fantasy football? I would have expected to have seen more trash talk.


  2. Just wanted to point out the obvious, but if you were rooting for an actual hometown team you'd have your pick of undefeated teams whose bandwagons you could jump on as you laugh mightily at the Boston loving clods.

  3. I'm from New York, Jamie. My only hometown team is 1-2. Went to college in Connecticut though, so my second closest hometown team is the Patriots and they are 2-1, with 3 superbowl championships under their belt. I'll take them anyday over any New Jersey team.

  4. So you're a Celtics and Red Sox fan as well?

  5. I can't for the life of me understand that, I'm a Mets fan. And a New York Liberty fan, these are New york teams I like. Buffalo Bills are NY team I do not like. I don't like any Jersey teams. Connecticut, as part of New England, supports my Patriots choice as a homage to my five years living in New Haven. What does any of that have to do with Boston?

  6. Just saying that your choices aren't a reflection of your hometown. And yes, the teams who play in Giants Stadium are New York hometown teams. It doesn't go by state, but by proximity to stadium. So if you want to mix and match, that's your prerogative, but those of us who live and die by the places we grow up in (that would be the majority) will laugh at those who jump on bandwagons (you).